This week I got word that one of our dear friends went home to be with the Lord-Mrs. Tammy Kang Hing. She shared with us some wonderful reflections about her end of life struggle. It blessed my heart and she wanted us to share it. Be blessed by the words of one who had the "hope of heaven."
September 25, 2008
Beloved Family and Friends,
I feel the urge to put some words to paper so here I am on a quiet Thursday night in Shanghai, China. I can feel lumps on the right side of my abdomen when hitherto the tumors have always been in the left hemisphere. Sounds like something out of an “Aliens” movie. Yuk! So the reality is that the cancer seems to be advancing. While I still hope for that longed-for miracle, I acknowledge that God is sovereign and I submit to His perfect will. Amazingly, I’m still enjoying pain-free days. Most mornings I turn on the stereo and just dance. Yeah, dance! While I still have all my faculties together. Might as well.
Zach comes home, jumps on the computer and discovered what I’ve been up to. I overheard him complaining to Anson, “Hey Pa, Mom turns her music on so LOUD when we’re away. What will the neighbors think??” Hey, our neighbors are all teachers and they’re at school like you. That’s how I get away with it, kiddo. Snitch. He wears the computer like an appendage and is constantly on MSN or Facebook. Your kids like that, too? These days he carries a furtive little smile and seems lost in his adolescent world. Who is his latest crush, I wonder. Isaac is still chasing balls. First it’s rugby, then soccer. Now tennis. The quintessential jock. I hear his jazz band is going to Paris in the spring. Paris?! Yes. Drool.
My children I worry not, for I have long ago introduced them to the One who will order their steps (God himself); the Comforter and Counselor who will teach them all things (the Holy Spirit) and the way to salvation (the Lord Jesus Christ). And I know my Lord will continue to show kindness and favor to my children, and my children’s children, for His love endures forever.
And Anson, my beloved Anson. He makes me so happy. When we were newly married, he used to wake me by showering kisses on my face until I squeal. Oh, how wonderful to be a new bride, I thought. I wonder how long this will last. Eighteen years later, he still wakes me with kisses. Do you? Do you still kiss your bride every morning?
We cannot change the hand we’re dealt, but we can decide how we want to play it. I decided I would play mine with positive Hope and gratitude. And truly, when I reflect I’m warmed by how blessed my life has been. So while in quantity I may have been given only a half measure; in quality, I have received more than a full measure. So much more.
The secret to maximizing life? Dare to dream. Then chase those dreams. Take risks. Stake it all on the line if you have to, for you only live once. People have wronged you? Forgive. Forgive again. Forget and move on. Seize the day! Celebrate. Don’t save your best silverware and crystal glasses for “the occasion”. Today IS the Occasion. For there may not be many tomorrows. Take that trip. Buy that designer dress. Take her out to dinner. Regrets? I would worry less. We are not meant to be weighed down by the cares of the world. Learn to cast your cares upon Jesus and live free.
All my life I’ve only known love and acceptance. My childhood was packed with two chief pursuits: fun and mischief. And a gang of eight like-minded girls whose friendships I cherish to this day. We had a blast! Here’s to more reunions! I enjoy a lifestyle that straddles two continents and the best that both have to offer. I remember when we lived in Arizona for two years, we must have visited some twenty national parks. Talk about packing it all in! We hiked, camped, fished. Back in Asia, I would comb beaches on our vacations, lose myself in markets and bazaars and of course, ate and ate as only a Malaysian knows how! I have lived life abundantly. My cup runs over!
But best of all are the friends I met on the way; relationships nurtured, cherished. As Shakespeare once said, “I’m ne’er so blessed as when I count my friends.” Ditto. Testament to that fact is having so many of you vicariously walking my final journey with me. I have never known great sorrow or tragedy. Neither the terrors of war nor disaster. I have held my baby in my arms. I have loved and been loved in return. All my dreams have come true. And then some. Surely goodness and mercy have crowned my days!
So now you see how difficult it is to leave all this behind. For truly I have tasted a slice of heaven even while here on earth. But Jesus said, “ In my Father’s house are many mansions. I have gone to prepare a place for you so that where I am, you will be also.” Me? Mansions? I would have been grateful to be a beggar in heaven! But there’s more. The Bible says that “Eye has not seen, ear has not heard, nor has God conceived into the minds of men the things He has planned for those who love Him.” Our minds cannot even begin to fathom how good it is going to get. Be rest assured, I will dwell in the House of the Lord forever!
And what about you? Do YOU know your eternal destiny? It is perhaps the most tragic reality of humanity in that deep in our spirits we so yearn for life to go on forever, yet it cannot. But it does! It DOES! For God so loved the world that He sent His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life. Tarry not, for the days are short, the years gone in a flash. I urge you do NOT rest until you find your answer. For God has promised that whosoever seeks Him in earnest will find Him. And in so doing I pray that someday you too can walk the Valley of the Shadow in triumph!
Share this message, for it is my last testimony of God’s enduring love. In closing, I wish to bless each of you with Numbers 6:24. “May the Lord bless you and keep you. May he make his face shine upon you. May he turn his face towards you and give you his peace.”
To GOD be all the glory! Till we meet again, shalom.
Tammy
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